Getting Fit – The Husband Project

My husband’s been lamenting his health lately…

For years he’s been advised to lose the pounds however, current lifestyle choices put him in a danger zone of sorts. After a recent health scare during our Vegas vacation, he seems to have a renewed sense of urgency to shed the pounds and get healthy. Surprisingly enough, he asked me to help him get there.

Now, I like a good project as much as the next person, which is why i’ve accepted my husband’s challenge to help him adopt a healthier lifestyle. I’m worried about his health and frankly, I’m tired of hearing him whine about it. (Where I’m from, there’s no crying in baseball.)

That may sound brusque but I’ve been along for the ride on many of his crazy “I’m going to eat healthy and get in shape” trains that inevitably derail.

As many people often do, my husband’s frequently tried to lose weight before. He’s attempted a bevy of approaches including everything from fad diets and extreme exercise programs to popular and mainstream diet options like Weight Watchers, South Beach, Zone Diet), and all to NO avail.

Time and time again, he’s tried these various programs or concocted his own weight loss spell because he thinks it will provide him with an out from his labyrinth of unhealthy living. But it never does.

While he has the best intentions, he seems to leave basic math out of the equation and gets a bit militant about what he’s allowed to have. He deprives himself of things he likes and instead of learning moderation or how to make a healthier choices he goes through a ‘have not’ cycle that makes him crave that which he’s ‘given up’ much faster.

Eventually the stringent thinking he tries to subscribe to backfires and suddenly, he’s throwing a rebellion for one and caves to cravings but instead of having a bite, he binges. That inevitably kicks off a self destructive cycle where he’s trapped in a perpetual continuum of self-loathing. It is beyond sad to watch.

From there he spirals further, ending up as a yo-yo dieter cautionary tale. Off the rails and reeling from defeat, he begins to overindulge in all the bad habits he disavowed a few days before. Now he’s heavier and feeling more defeated than before, if that’s possible.

Everyone knows there’s an unfortunate and accompanying stigma associated with being overweight. Society fat shames the obese & praises the scary skinny so it’s no wonder deterred dieters enter an inner dialogue of self destructive thinking. It’s madness.

I totally get it’s hard to break cycles. While i’m not overweight I’m not in the best shape either and I’ve been working on it steadfastly for a decade. I really believe the key to sustained lifestyle changes lies in changing your process–not in just the day to day choices you’re making but also, the rationale behind your decision making.

Dieting is stupid and by design, sets users up to fail. What my husband should be focusing on, instead of drastic eating and exercise programs, is a paradigm shift in his thinking. He’s not giving up anything, all he has to gain is the benefits from healthy lifestyle choices but he quickly forgets that and caves to his inner critic when his cravings get a ninja grip on his brain and won’t let him think otherwise.

Self-doubt is an inner bully trying to push you around & kick your ass. It’s a negative inner dialog seems to be the loudest when individual willpower is low. Don’t let it. Yielding to your inner critic found lurking inside is a trap. Free yourself.

Working on one’s health is a process: therein lies a crucial point for anyone on a journey toward any goal, health or otherwise. Goals take time. Establishing clockwork takes time. Stay on the path, keep on trucking and continue on the journey.

Getting in shape is part black magic a sprinkle of luck, and a heck of a lot of determination and I firmly believe that if you change your perspective and you change your world.

Here’s hoping i can help my husband alter his and realize he’s not giving up anything but trying a nutrition program that incorporates portion control, math and regular physical activity (and I don’t mean walking to the fridge to get a new seasonal IPA).

Really, I mean it all with love.

 

Resolution Updates

To say I haven’t blogged in a while is an understatement. My  last post is from January 1, 2014, and it’s from way back when I blogged about my list of New Year’s goals.

Everyone knows resolutions are hard to set. Goals by nature are intended as a challenge and while accomplishing them can feel euphoric, the downside to not achieving them can be far more demoralizing.

According to Forbes Magazine, a mere 8% of people achieve their New Year’s resolutions. This translates to 92-ish percent of people failing to meet their personal goals. That’s pretty depressing.

So, how did this “underachiever” fare? Well, I’m pleased to report I successfully achieved ALL my New Year’s resolutions this year!

Yea, that’s right. . . I’m batting a thousand!! #holla

New Year’s Resolutions 2014

Today is January 1, 2014, the first day of the New Year, a perfect time to hit the reset button and start fresh. Like many others, I spent some time thinking about setting some personal goals for 2014 and was surprised to find that coming up with a list of New Year’s resolutions proved more difficult than usual for me this time around.

Seriously, making a simple list had me racking my brain and I wasn’t sure why. Normally I could come up with an itemized catalog of goals and aspirations with little to no effort but this year was a challenge. Irritated at myself for taking way too much time to come up with a list of three measly things, I asked my husband if he thought I was an underachiever.

Now, I’m not quite sure what I was trying to get at by asking such a brash question however, without hesitation and with a resounding ‘yes’ that leaped from his lips before I could finish, my husband confirmed something I had long worried was true yet I never fully acknowledged and that is this,

“Jenna–you are an underachiever.”

Ouch.

Now while some partners may have a problem with their spouse blurting out a boldly affirmative answer to such a delicate question with fervent candor, I applaud my husband’s honesty. Hey, let’s face it,  if I had answer the question truthfully myself, I would agree with him completely.

Great, Jenna. Now what?

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So long 2013, you’ve been a good year.

It’s 12/31/2013, the last day of the year and New Year’s resolutions are abound. The Internet is brimming with an array of advice and it’s easy to find a guru’s latest take on anything. From tips on how to find personal happiness in 2014 to long and lengthy lists giving you ‘proven’ ways to succeed at keeping your New Year’s resolutions, anything and everything is just a Google machine search away. Since I usually have something to say about one thing or another, I’m listing my top resolutions/goals in hopes that I’ll stick with and/or achieve them in 2014.

In no particular order, here they are:

1. Finish getting in shape. I have been working diligently to rehab my body. I’m coming up on a notable birthday and I don’t want to have bingo lady arms in my Vegas party pics.

2. Speaking of Vegas—seeing #BritneySpears at Planet Hollywood is a must! I adore Brit Brit; she is one tenacious and talented lady. Many times when I was going through some funky stuff I often repeated to myself, “If Britney can get through 2007—I can handle this.”

It’s hard to believe Britney Spear’s debut album is a more than 15 years old. I give props to her strength and have to figure out a way to get Britney Spears tickets for her show at Planet Hollywood in 2014.

Britney Spears kicked off her Planet Hollywood residency!
#BritneySpears @ #PlanetHollywood #woot

3. Paint. I have a stack of art supplies and have been meaning to find my creative streak again but for some reason, it just sits there.

One final note, while it’s easy to search for items to put on your list, perhaps we’d be better served if instead we made a list of things we aspire to be. Let’s take the negative connotation out of New Year’s resolutions and strive to add at least one positive habit to try catching instead. In 2014, I’d like to stop regretting my choices. I am determined to view my life through the windshield and I will not fixate on the replay of past events. Happy New Year yinz!